This is Episode 6 – The Emotional Toll of Infertility from Season 2 of the Juna Women Podcast. Season 2 is about planning your family.
Today’s episode is the 6th part of our Family Planning Series, and we’re talking all about the emotional toll infertility can take on the lives of those it affects and the people around them.
By the end of this episode you should have some tools to help you process many of these emotions, learn the things to say and do if you have a friend or family member going through infertility, and set yourself up for success if you’re just beginning you’re trying to conceive journey.
To kick things off, I chatted with Rebekah Rosler, a licensed master social worker, and doula, who serves as a guide for women who are in the family planning process, undergoing fertility treatments, pregnant, or adjusting to being a new parent.
Infertility & Guilt
Guilt can be a very common feeling that accompanies infertility. By definition, feeling guilty means you feel you did something wrong and while our intellectual side knows we haven’t, feelings of guilt can keep rearing its ugly head.
In some instances guilt can be a good thing because it leads to remorse, but guilt without causation can cause self-doubt, decreased self esteem, and shame. Guilt rears its head in all different ways.
Here are some common thoughts you may hav around infertility and how you can reframe them with a positive spin.
Thought: I can’t get pregnant and it’s my fault.
Reframe: I’m doing the things that are in my control and letting go of the thing that aren’t.
Thought: I worried so much about building my career first that I wore my body out
Reframe: I created a safe and secure environment for my future family, whatever that looks like.
Thought: I’ll never be happy, unless I have a baby.
Reframe: I can control my attitude and interactions every day.
Thought: My friend is pregnant and I’m jealous and then I feel guilty about feeling jealous.
Reframe: I need to communicate with my friend how I’m feeling even thought I know it might be irrational.
LISTEN TO THE EPISODE
If you’re interested in the finer details and listening to my the conversations with Amy and Rebekah, you can find the full interviews on our IGTV channel, @juna.moms on Instagram.
If you have any questions, comments, or need some more guidance during your Trying To Conceive journey, please e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
On the next episode, we’ll be talking with Stephanie Valakas a Registered Dietician who specializes in nutrition during the fertility and preconception phase.
Thanks for listening, and see you next week.
Featured in this episode:
Writer, Author of “The Trying Game”
Amy Klein is a health and lifestyle reporter, who has written for The New York Times — both her Fertility Diary column AND Modern Love. After 10 doctors, over four years in three countries (and four miscarriages) she finally got and stayed pregnant with her daughter. Find Amy on: Instagram
The Trying Game: Get Through Fertility Treatment and Get Pregnant Without Losing Your Mind
Doula and Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Wife and mom to a four-year-old and a set of two-year-old twins, (in)fertility warrior, community builder, supporter, friend, connector, counselor, advocate, doula, coach, Licensed Master of Social Work based out of Manhattan.
Connect with Rebekah: https://its-conceivable.com/